Okay, you are probably thinking, “can a single mom be a proverbs 31 woman?” My answer is yes. However, the amazing qualities of a Proverbs 31 woman presents differently for a single mom due to the nature of the situation they’re in.
Here is a fun blog post/ devotional to explore every part of Proverbs 31, change the way you view the scripture, be able to see yourself in the Word and no longer feel as though you could never embody the qualities of a Proverbs 31 woman.
Story Behind The Proverbs 31 Woman
What exactly is a Proverbs 31 woman?
The proverbs 31 woman is actually a very controversial part in the bible that christians debate of the true purpose of the scriptures often. For many years, we believed that it was mostly about the description of a virtuous woman or an ideal woman.
Recently, there has been more bible scholars considering that it may be connected to the advice that King Lemuel’s mother provided, ultimately describing his mother.
Personally, I don’t care whether it was a ode to her, a fantasy woman, or a complete description of how we are suppose to be as women. I love to read between the lines and see myself in the scripture. And as hard as that was for me, I love it.
I remember the first time I read the Proverbs 31 woman and saying to myself I do not recognize her. Now that I have been rooted in Christ and really walking in His principles, I can relate to most of , if not all the verses in this chapter.
Do you have to be married to be a Proverbs 31 woman?
No, you don’t have to be married to be a Proverbs 31 woman. However, the description of this woman is centered around a woman who was married with a husband.
When we read this part of the chapter, it’s not to become exactly like the scripture but to take away the amazing character and qualities she had and embody them as a godly woman.
Therefore, the next section is my own rendition of Proverbs 31 for single moms. I hope you are uplifted and edified by the correlation I make with each scripture from 10 to verse 31. ENJOY!
Proverbs 31 and The Single Mom
Proverbs 31 : Verses 10-15
10-Who can find a virtuous and capable wife?
She is more precious than rubies.
As a single mom, you can also be a virtuous and capable wife. The scripture is not implying, as I have read, that she is already a wife but she has the potential to be. Most single moms have the potential to be a godly wife; however, men tend to be blind to how precious we are as single mothers.
11 Her husband can trust her,
and she will greatly enrich his life.
Again, the scripture does not confirm that she already has a husband. What the Word does say is that men can be able to trust her because she’s trustworthy and that she can add to the life of any man that comes and vice versa.
Single moms you can add value. Don’t let this world make you think you are a burden to a man or others. You are far from that; you are a blessing.
12 She brings him good, not harm,
all the days of her life.
Single mom, you should always look to bring good into your own life and in the lives of other. We should never be the ones bringing drama and discourse into the life of a man we are being courted by or to the people we interact with daily.
Especially as Christian single moms, it should be our life work to be of good and impact the world in ways that glorify God and do not fit into the confusion, chaos, and destruction of a quarrelsome woman.
13 She finds wool and flax
and busily spins it.
This verse is pretty straightforward and can be an essential truth for the current climate of single motherhood. We are in a time as single moms where we have to be more resourceful and with a focus and work ethic that keeps us stable despite the current financial and consumer climate.
God wants you to know, single moms, to always go to your source, and He will show you the resources you need to remain working and meeting a need.
14 She is like a merchant’s ship,
bringing her food from afar.
I love this quality because I’ve seen single moms operate like this today. A Proverbs single moms is always seeking the best and better for her family. Within this quality, she does not settle for convinence and habit, but for the best quality for her family.
She is not falling victim to fast food marketing. She is exposing her children to healthy, more nutritious foods. She is not following the cycle of previous generations where they just ate to survive, but she is choosing to thrive in health because she knows her family depends on her to nurture and guide them into what is best. Mama Knows Best!
15 She gets up before dawn to prepare breakfast for her household
and plan the day’s work for her servant girls.
I don’t know about you but I am not a early bird. However I do make sure I get up before my daughter make sure she’s taken care of and that our day is productive. You may not be able to relate to having servant girls as we are the servant girls; wearing many hats in our home.
Know that your hard work does not go unnoticed. When you don’t get the 8 hours you would like to make sure your kids are good and things are done, you are seen. When you are planning and holding the day together for your family and work, we see you.
Proverbs 31: Verses 16-20
16 She goes to inspect a field and buys it;
with her earnings she plants a vineyard.
As a single mom, we often have to be strategic with what we invest money and time in. I honor the wisdom that rests upon you, the discernment that allows you to know what’s best for you and your family.
We make something out of nothing and do the things we enjoy in unconventional ways. I honor you, single mom, for your resourcefulness, creativity, and skills you possess to further your family.
17 She is energetic and strong,
a hard worker.
Uh run that scripture again! You are energetic, strong, and a hard worker. You may feel as though you are running on fumes; that means you need to rest and take care of yourself.
You are energetic about the things that fill you up and pour into you. You are strong because you endure and overcome the daily challenges that come with being a single mother. Lastly, you are not lazy. You may be overwhelmed or struggling but that does not take away the fact you are doing all you can for your family.
18 She makes sure her dealings are profitable;
her lamp burns late into the night.
If you are not adding value to the life of a single mom, you might want to kick rocks. We do not have time for the foolery. We have too much riding on us and can’t afford to be distracted.
Single mom, you have goals, you have a focus to improve and get better everyday. You set healthy boundaries and make sure who you associate with is an asset rather than a liability, your wheels up there are spinning throughout the night on how you can improve or change your situation. You are a Proverbs 31 woman, believe that!
19 Her hands are busy spinning thread,
her fingers twisting fiber.
Back in the day the women was busy making clothes, household items, cooking, and gardening. In the modern day, we spend our time running businesses, providing customer service, typing a book, or uplifting the online world.
Single moms know that we always have to keep are hands hard at work, making dinner, checking emails, cleaning our homes, and so much more. If you have hands, you should be busy working on your skills, talents, and gifts.
20 She extends a helping hand to the poor
and opens her arms to the needy.
It is easy for a single mom to get caught up in her situation of poverty or need, but you’re not like that. As a Proverbs 31 single mom, you consider the needs and interests of others.
You give what you give and serve where you can help. If you haven’t walked into this quality, this is one of the most important ones because God has called us to give and serve not for compensation but because we love Him.
Proverbs 31: Verses 21-25
21 She has no fear of winter for her household,
for everyone has warm[b] clothes.
Lord, can you help me with this one? This quality and verse remind us how she plans and make sure nothing catches her by surprise. She anticipates the needs of her family and shops ahead of time.
My mom is this type of woman and I honor her for that. Single moms, if you are a think-ahead type of mom and make sure everyone has what they need in your family, then know that you are unique and doing a great job.
22 She makes her own bedspreads.
She dresses in fine linen and purple gowns.
Another one the Lord needs to intervene on my behalf. However, single moms of today, is this quality and more. Here, it describes how she takes pride in her appearance and the presentation of her home.
Single mom, if you already do all of this, you have nothing to be down about. For those who struggle in this area, know that you can present yourself authentically, well-dressed, and caring for your home the best of your ability. You don’t have to look like what you’re going through.
23 Her husband is well known at the city gates,
where he sits with the other civic leaders.
Okay, I know we have no earthly husband. However, we are the bride of Christ, the church. Therefore, our husband, savior, rock, and foundation is Jesus. A husband is someone you are in covenant with, do life with, and make decisions with.
I would think of this quality of that for single moms as our relationship with Jesus. He is well-known and sits with those who are important and leaders for this life which is God and Holy Spirit. You get my drift, so you can still resonate with this part of her.
24 She makes belted linen garments
and sashes to sell to the merchants.
You may not see yourself as a businesswoman. However, you are intelligent and diligent and have a purpose to impact, whether in the marketplace or your home. You are creative in meeting a need of another and can make a living from it.
You care for others by providing a service or product that can meet their need while getting what you need financially. She wasn’t afraid to create another avenue of income for her and her family. Therefore, single mom, if you consider the needs of others and find ways to get them to their goal than in you are operating in this quality well.
25 She is clothed with strength and dignity,
and she laughs without fear of the future.
You are a virtuous woman embodying and surround yourself with respect. You are rooted in who you are, are strong enough to face adversity head-on, and don’t take yourself too seriously.
A Proverbs 31 single mom know hardship can come her way but she does not let fear to direct her life. She chooses to laugh and enjoy her life without regret or reservation. Knows that your future is blessed and that you do not have to settle for anything.
Proverbs 31: Verses 26-31
26 When she speaks, her words are wise,
and she gives instructions with kindness.
Single mom, your voice is powerful. The power of life and death is in your tongue. Single mom what you say matters. When you speak, you create the self-talk in your child’s head, you set the atmosphere in your home, and you create the life you will have.
You are kind. You do not have to allow your emotions, especially anger, and frustration, to keep you from speaking kindly unto others. Whether it’s a co-worker, co-parent, parent, or friend, you use your mouth for peace, not for quarrels and chaos.
27 She carefully watches everything in her household
and suffers nothing from laziness.
“Mama sees everything!” You probably remember saying this and you are probably say it now to your own kids. As single moms, the world tries to make it seem like we ignore our kids and let them run wild. Big Lies!
We embody this quality big time. I always keep a good eye on everything in my household and I know you do too. Sometimes we’re exhausted, and things slip past us, but that’s far few. Laziness is nowhere found within us even though the world tries to portray us as such. You work hard, you do it all, and you pray over your home.
28 Her children stand and bless her.
Her husband praises her:
My favorite Mother’s Day scripture to use every year. As single moms, we often look to the feedback and reviews from our kids to measure how well we are doing as a mother. Know that your children can not define you, and your identity should not rest in them. Kids fluctuate in what they like or don’t like.
However, if your children tell you that you are the best mom in the world, then believe them. Only they know what they need from you, and you are the only one to provide it. As single moms, we can feel that we are falling short but cherish the praises of her children, and when the husband comes, enjoy those too. You are a blessed single mom! Yes, you are!
29 “There are many virtuous and capable women in the world,
but you surpass them all!”
Single mom never feels like they have to compare themselves to anyone but know that they stand out whether you want to. You are unique and set apart. You are one of kind in a sea full of women.
Remind yourself that anything the next woman has is for that woman. Your life is your life and that there is always someone adoring you and being inspired by your story and testimony. You are not created to blend in but to be extraordinary.
30 Charm is deceptive, and beauty does not last;
but a woman who fears the Lord will be greatly praised.
A Proverbs 31 woman never has to put on a show for attention. You don’t have to use your charisma or beauty as a weapon. She knows that her relationship with Jesus will make her stand out like a bright light in darkness.
You are not your tricks. You are not just your looks. I know this because single moms are usually beautiful women who made the wrong choice with men or widowed/divorced. It’s her devotion, her prayer life, and her knowledge of the word that will get her praised longer than any tactic or beauty fad can. You are a woman of God!
31 Reward her for all she has done.
Let her deeds publicly declare her praise.
I don’t believe that single mothers get the recognition they deserve, nor does God get the praise He deserves for turning the storyline around for many single moms. You deserve a rewarded for the blood, sweat, and tears you’ve shown to live and raise your children to thrive in the things of God and their life here on earth.
Furthermore, let your actions speak for you. Let your character and deeds put your name in rooms and catch the attention of people who God can use to meet your needs. Single mom, you will reap in due time what all you’ve sown.
All in all,
You are an amazing women. You are so dynamic and wear many hats in your life. You are every bolded word or phrase in this blog post. Believe it!
Any thought or lie that does not line up with what is said here will no longer affect you because you now know who you are, what you are capable of, and how you were created to impact the world, your family and the kingdom of God.
I pray you never look at the scriptures of Proverbs 31 as an unreachable standard but that you see yourself woven through every word in the section. I pray you embrace your new identity and call, glorifying God in the process.
Below share with me your greatest takeway in the comments!
Need additional support seeing yourself in Proverbs 31? Check out these related blog post:
- 6 Tools To Help Find Your Identity In Christ: Printable Roundup
- Do I Belong Here?: Scriptures and Quotes To Remind You That You Do
- How To Rediscover Yourself After Becoming A Mom
You can also join the Women Seeking Confidence Facebook group for a community of women headed in the same direction as you in regards to growing in confidence:
