Let me tell you about my funny Sunday night, life planning, and single mom goals setting rendezvous. Itty bitty was fast asleep, so I thought I had ample time to reflect and figure out what I was going to do for my 2021 goals.
I pulled out my life planning binder and I came across my 2020 goal list. Y’all, I literally had over 21 goals written down! What was I thinking????!!!!
How was I going to accomplish all these goals in the midst of a pandemic? Don’t get me wrong, I accomplished a few and even progressed to about 50% for others. Praise God!
After laughing at myself, I realized that I needed to make some changes in regards to what I believe my goals for 2021 were going to be. I decided not to go the route I have gone before.
I value simplicity but my goals didn’t reflect it.
I value freedom and experiences but I am setting goals for more classes and education.
I had to declare that I want to see some real-life change, both in myself and those around me. But it was only possible by aligning my goals to my values/God’s values and not creating goals that matched with what the world values.
Be ready to change your GOALS, but never change your VALUES. – Dalai Lama
- 1 Redefining Single Mom Goals
- 2 Single Mom Goals Revamped
- 3 Goal Setting & Structure
- 3.1 Specific – Is the goal clear and definitive? Avoid being general.
- 3.2 Measurable – Is there an easy way to track progress or tell when you’ve achieved it?
- 3.3 Attainable – Is the goal too ambitious and will cause more struggle?
- 3.4 Relevant – Does this goal benefit you and is consistent with your interest?
- 3.5 Timely – Can it be achieved in 2021?
- 3.6 Valuable – Does it align with or bring me closer to what I find most important? (below is an example list of core values)
- 4 Ready, Set, Goal.
- 5 All in all,
- 6 Chyna Nicole
- 7 Related
Redefining Single Mom Goals
Goals are, according to Webster, the end toward which effort is directed. It’s often an idea concerning the future or the desired outcome that an individual envisions, plans, and commits to achieve.
But for a single mom, goals take a totally different form. Our goals are all about getting back to ourselves, making home life better, increasing our finances, improving our parenting, and increasing our faith.
We have different directions our energy and effort is given and we don’t have time to direct our energy to things that do not serve our greater purpose of supporting the kingdom, our families, and bringing peace and joy in our lives.
Single mom goals should be viewed as a checkpoint in our journey or race.
God often refers to life as a race in the bible and how we should have the endurance to get to the finish line and win. “Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us rid ourselves of every burden and sin that clings to us and persevere in running the race that lies before us while keeping our eyes fixed on Jesus” (Hebrews 12:1).
Single mom goals are important because they provide us with a vision of where we want to go and are headed to. I shared a quote when I first started my journey about the connection of overwhelm with no vision. A goal helps you keep the overwhelm, confusion, and distractions at bay.
When you know what you want out of life, life gets easier. Without vision, you are simply overwhelmed. – Chyna Nicole
Single Mom Goals Revamped
I believe single moms should engage in goal setting because it allows you to think outside of your current circumstance. It opens up an opportunity for us to dream again and identify what areas we need to pray over to make sure they align with the life God has for us.
Setting goals provide an opportunity for us to overcome and exceed stereotypical perceptions such as:
- Fixed Poverty Mindset
- Poor Home Management
- Low-Income
- Needy and Dependent
- No Aspirations
Not to say we won’t struggle with these areas from time to time. However, when our minds are set on things above and bigger than us ( Colossians 3:1), our struggle can’t have us.
Goal Setting & Structure
When I set my goals I tend to use these standards of quality to ensure proper goal setting. Or maybe because I’m an allied health professional constantly creating goals for my rehab patients. Below I show each part of a SMART Goal and how you would decipher if your goals are well-rounded.
-
Specific – Is the goal clear and definitive? Avoid being general.
-
Measurable – Is there an easy way to track progress or tell when you’ve achieved it?
-
Attainable – Is the goal too ambitious and will cause more struggle?
-
Relevant – Does this goal benefit you and is consistent with your interest?
-
Timely – Can it be achieved in 2021?
-
Valuable – Does it align with or bring me closer to what I find most important? (below is an example list of core values)
Make sure you take your time with identifying your values. Sometimes we adopt things because of the influence of others. However, these values, core values, constitute who you are at your core.
If you have not done that work of becoming self-aware to the point of knowing your true desires out of life, I would encourage you to go to God in prayer to reveal things about, how he created you, and take some time to date yourself by checking out 50 Journal Prompts For Dating Yourself to support your journey.
Are you overwhelmed? Don’t be. Goal setting does not have to be scary. Keep you and God at the center of your goal setting and you should be fine.
I wrote a post last year about things you should consider before creating your goals. Here are some of the tips:
- Know the reason why you want to set goals in the first place.
- Identify the areas in your life that need the most change.
- Make sure you are the motivation for your goals, not someone else.
- Brainstorm ways you can stay motivated for the long haul throughout the year.
- Recognize if the goal can or cannot be attainable in 12 months.
- Prepare your emotional response for both outcomes, whether you meet your goals or not.
You can also check out the full blog post here: Single Mom Goals – 6 Things To Consider
Ready, Set, Goal.
As a bonus, I took the opportunity to create an effective, yet simple worksheet to help guide you through value-based goal setting. Download your copy in the Freebie Vault! Don’t have the password? Sign up to join the community for the 2023 password for the freebie vault!
I also provided a picture of the worksheet that I filled out on my Sunday night rendezvous.
Don’t mind my poor handwriting. I was always meant to be a doctor! LOL
My Values: Connection/Community, Freedom/Adventure, Family Growth, Achievement/Self-Expression
New Goals: I will lead a single mom small group at church, travel to one new country, implement 3 healthy strategies for better communication and boundary setting with my daughter, and complete my first book.
The Reward: A staycation at a spa resort in Arizona.
Update: I COMPLETED ALL EXCEPT FOR MY BOOK WHICH I WILL BE DOING IN 2023 FOR A 2024 PUBLISH! 🙌🏾 So be on the look out!
All in all,
I hope this version of Single Mom Goals 2021-2023 has been helpful to you and provided you additional resources to aid you on your goal-setting journey. I learned early on that if you stay connected with God and your values, you are where you’re supposed to be.
What are your single mom goals this year?
If you need additional assistance with your single mom goals, check out these supportive post:
- 6 Things To Consider Before Setting Goals
- Boldness: 7 Keys To Asking For What You Want
- 5 Changes To Make For Single Mom Success This Year
- 12 Tips To Begin Leading Yourself In Life
You can also join the Women Seeking Confidence Facebook group for a community of women headed in the same direction as you in regards to growing in relationships:
